When you first meet people try to notice their eye color while also smiling at them. It might be because you look for a second or two longer, but all I can tell you is that people really respond to it.
If you ask someone to do you a small favor, cognitive dissonance will make them believe that because they did that favor, they therefore must like you.
If you get yourself to be really happy and excited to see other people, they will react the same to you. It doesn’t always happen the first time, but it will definitely happen next time.
People will remember not what you said but how you made them feel.
Refer to people you’ve just met by their name. People loving being referred to by their name, and it will establish a sense of trust and friendship right away.
People have a certain image of themselves and will fight tooth and nail to cling to it. Use this information wisely. You can make people dislike you by attacking their self image.
Foot-in-the-door phenomenon. People are more likely to agree to do a task for you if you ask them to do something simpler first. (Gradual Commitment… makes people them think you like them).
Ask them to do an unreasonable task, and they’ll say no, so then you ask for what you wanted, a much more reasonable task, and they’re more likely to agree that way.
Chew gum when you’re approaching a situation that would make you nervous like public speaking or bungee jumping. I can’t remember where I heard it but apparently if we are ‘eating’ something in our brains trip and it reasons ‘I would not be eating if I were danger. So I’m not in danger’. Has helped calm me a few times.
For interviews I recommend altering your psychological state beforehand. Tell yourself “I’ve known these people all my life. We’re old friends catching up. I can’t wait to see them”. Visualise the experience, shaking hands, making eye contact, having conversation. What things can you not to wait to tell them? Hold an open pose, stand with your legs apart, hands on your hips, and shoulders back while doing this and SMILE. This may sound cliche but you are in charge of your own psychological state and the power of suggestion is strong.
The key to confidence is walking into a room, and assuming everyone already likes you.
The physical effects of stress (increased breathing rate, heart rate etc.) mirror identically the physical effects of courage. So when you’re feeling stress from any situation immediately reframe it: your body is getting ready to do courage, it’s Not feeling stress.
False attribution of arousal. When you take somebody out on a first date, take them somewhere exciting and it will get their heart beating eg roller coaster or horror film. This gets their adrenaline up. It makes them think they enjoy spending time with you rather than the activity.
People are extraordinarily aware of their sense of touch. If someone ‘accidentally’ rests their knee on yours, let’s say, they know it’s there.